last night we paid the 1/3 deposit of the catering bill for the wedding. jared picked up the check from my dad and we then went together to meet with our caterers and finalize some things. my thoughts were....really??? this is so much money.
when looking at all the costs, even from a very frugal approach, getting married costs a lot. there are lots of little things, too. little things that the boys don't think about. since we are going a non-traditional route for the site, there are extra little costs and details here and there. i like having input and even using my own two hands at creating the scene of our wedding.
when we first got engaged, jared was convinced that we could throw a pretty nice wedding for around $10k. i was convinced otherwise, but like most things concerning reality, i had to sit back and wait for it to settle in for him we are well over double that with our very modest plans. (note: the average cost of a wedding is nj is around $30k) i knew just from my sisters frugal planning that it wouldn't be easy to not spend a lot, esp with all the people that we want to invite. with family alone we are close to 100 guests!! add in some friends and it starts to get out of hand.
currently, the guest list is over 200 which is NOT happening. i think this might be the most painful part of the process. friends, if you are reading this, know that if you aren't invited, it's not bc i don't love you. jared and i have so many friends we could have a separate, grandiose wedding just with them!
i keep coming back in my mind to the scene of a friends wedding about ten years ago. we had worked together and she was a bit older than myself. the wedding was at the brentwood which is a sort of wedding-factory near where we now live. the wedding was crazy and loud. lots of food, lots of music, lots of people i didn't know. by the time she got to our table, she looked exhausted and as we hugged she whispered in my ear....when you are ready to get married -- just elope!
i still couldn't resist asking jared if we could just take the deposit and go elope in hawaii (since he want to go there so damn bad, more on that later)-- saving ourselves from some impending drama. jared didn't like that idea much. i had to try, right? the check exchanged hands and as we walked out of the restaurant we both looked at eachother with a bit of frienzy and giggled....we're really getting married!!
i consider myself a pretty good thrower of parties, so this should be pretty kick ass.